Many believe that the role of art in society is to define the culture of a certain time and place. At Lehigh, such art is all around, whether you have noticed it or not. I have divided the art seen at Lehigh into three distinct categories: Art, Modern Art, and Stall Art. Their existence at Lehigh and student’s responses to them provide an interesting look at Lehigh’s culture.

Art

Traditional art consists of the paintings, stained glass windows, and other established methods of expression. Even the architecture of buildings like Alumni Memorial and Packer Chapel satisfy the definition of expressing something about Lehigh.  While such displays are everywhere, they go completely unnoticed by a sizeable portion of the Lehigh population. How often do students walk by Alumni Memorial each day, without realizing how incredible a structure it is? Can you describe the paintings on display in Rauch Lobby right now? Traditional art receives the least attention from Lehigh students. This is a sad fact, because the art is all downhill from here.

Modern Art

Chunk - The Museum of Modern Art

Lehigh, for an unknown reason, has been able to acquire a great deal of interesting sculptures that have been strewn haphazardly across the campus. These sculptures can be broadly defined as modern art. While the definition of modern art is tough to determine, I generally use a simple test which requires answering only three questions:

1. Do you think it is pretty?
2. Do you know what the artist was trying to express?
3. Did you initially wonder how you ended up at a junkyard?

If you answer ‘no’ to two out of three of the above questions, you are probably looking at modern art. My personal favorite is not at Lehigh yet, but my hope is that a generous alumnus will send “Chunk” (pictured below) from the Museum of Modern Art to Lehigh where it belongs. While “Chunk” may not provide as many drunk-photo opportunities as pieces like the model student or woman on bench, I am sure students would find a way to utilize some of its finer qualities.

Stall Art

Stall Art - Lehigh University

Lastly, we arrive at the art that Lehigh students are most intimately involved with: stall art. The public restroom has always served as a hub for news, rumors, and more. Thanks to Lehigh dining, many students spend a good portion of their day frequenting some of the many stalls around campus.

This, inevitably, leads to expressions that come directly from Lehigh students. As such, they provide the most detail about the culture at Lehigh and provide a great way for all students to learn on the job. Lessons in anatomy, philosophy, and even physics can all be found around campus.

For those freshmen who need a quick social lesson, stall art at Lehigh provides that too. A quick tour through several stalls can provide anyone with a good idea of which fraternities house the cool guys, and which fraternities no one likes. Events like Meet the Greeks and open houses are meant to be the way students are introduced to Greek life. However, stall art has allowed many savvy freshmen to form preconceived notions before they even head up on the Hill.

Stall art may not be as refined as its partners on campus are. However, no one can deny that a visit to several public bathrooms on campus would give prospective students a much better idea of life at Lehigh than a stroll down University walkway.

Replacing “A Moment With Mumma” will be “The Lighter Side” where an editor or author discussing some of the events that we saw in the news over the past month in a “lighter” way. This section may contain blatant or hidden sarcasm, distasteful jokes, and or other literary devices that should not be read literally. Thank you and enjoy!

On September 17^th, President Gast held a townhall meeting discussing the short and long-term goals for the Lehigh community. Were you there? Probably not, considering most people have classes from 1 to 2:30 on a Thursday. Did you hear about it before hand? Again, probably not. The events advertisements consisted of an article on the Lehigh homepage, strategically hidden along other exciting headlines such as “A dose of HPC helps buildings survive earthquakes intact,” and “Arup SenGupta wins new acclaim for improving global health.”

While it really is great that Arup developed technology to remove arsenic from drinking water in poverty-stricken regions of the world, the headline isn’t really something to make you sit up in your chair. Everything aside though, this town hall meeting clearly was not designed for the Lehigh student body to attend. There’s two reasons why this could be the case. First, President Gast and company don’t think students care about the strategic vision or second, they don’t want students to care about the strategic vision.

I felt this was something I should look into, and thus did something no Lehigh student has done yet. I downloaded the 30-page Strategic Plan, and read it. It’s not the most exciting thing in the world, but I did pick up that the strategic plan is big on strategies. In 30 pages, the word ‘Strategic’ appears 44 times. This brought to mind an amusing image of President Gast sitting in her office muttering “Strategery” in her very best George Bush imitation.

But let’s move on to more important things, such as the aforementioned Strategic Plan. It is simple in essence, looking to improve Lehigh, the faculty, students, and the local community. From the wording of the document, it is clearly a long-term strategy. Along with ‘strategy’, the document is peppered with phrases like “intend to build”, “advancing our intellectual footprint”, “position us well for developing further”, and “we aspire to.” As the wording shows, the strategic plan isn’t a strategy for us as students, but rather for the Lehigh of the future.

That’s not a bad thing. Certainly Lehigh needs to look toward the future, and since most of us won’t be active members of the Lehigh community 10 years from now, it makes that we won’t be the ones affected. Even so, a better effort should be made to allow current students to weigh in on the strategic plan, and play a role. Students have a different perspective on Lehigh, and have an entirely different set of experiences. Strategically, hearing student’s opinions and questions will benefit Lehigh and the strategic plan. Hopefully next time Lehigh’s administrators will make a better effort to involve students.

Civil Discourse

As the health care debate rages on, people are starting to lose extremities. Less than a month ago, William Rice was arguing with another protester when a scuffle broke out. In the ensuing melee, the tip of William’s pinkie finger was bitten off.¹

The alleged attacker was protesting with a group organized by Moveon.org, a left-leaning web organization. It has yet to be determined if this is now the official strategy of the Democratic Party, since calling protesters names such as “Un-American” seems to have failed to curb their enthusiasm.

Sadly, doctors were unable to reattach the rest of William’s pinkie. Despite the loss of the digit, there was an ironic benefit for William. His trip to the ER was covered by his Government-run Medicare policy.²

1 – http://www.theweek.com/article/index/100164/How_Bill_Rices_finger_was_bitten_off

2 – http://blogs.laweekly.com/ladaily/community/man-bites-off-protesters-finge/

Sing a new song onto the Lord

In an effort to reestablish the totalitarian regimes of Europe during the 1940’s, one New Jersey teacher is attempting to start her own cult of youth for President Obama. Modeled after the Hitler Youth, the teacher had her entire class singing songs of praise for Barack Obama.

With the surfacing of a video of the event on YouTube, the teacher’s movement is in jeopardy as the school district is launching an investigation. Nevertheless, these students will clearly have lyrics such as “He said we must be fair today, equal work means equal pay. Mmm, mmm, mm! Barack Hussein Obama.”³

If this means that politicians are next-in-line behind religious figures for songs of adulation, then my worldview has been turned upside down.

That’s all I’ve got. I’m off to write my ballad of praise for Mark Sanford and John Edwards and their upstanding morals.

3 – http://www.foxnews.com/politics/2009/09/24/lyrics-songs-president-obama/

Editor’s Note: a form of ‘strategy’ was used 18 times in this article. For over double the strategery visit www.lehigh.edu/2009plan/

The art of complaining is developed in humans from a very young age. Over the years, it seems that our generation has attained markedly improved skills in this area compared to our predecessors. While most of our parents’ generation couldn’t whine and talk back without getting smacked, our generation was mostly able to avoid such a tragic fate. Whether this is due to the laws in place against child abuse or the compassion of our parents’ generation is uncertain, but it is also beside the point. What we have now is a mass of people in their twenties who find it outrageous when one little thing does not meet their understanding of “fair.”

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The predictability of Spring-time at Lehigh is, in fact, quite nauseating. The weather will be awful, while tempting you once or twice with the warm weather. Once you cooped up studying for finals, spring will actually arrive. The weather is only part of the story though. Along with the dreary weather, spring at Lehigh brings with it the “rejection season.” The rejections, which come in a variety of types during February and March, are truly what give spring semester its joyous disposition.

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“History shows us that differences in leadership tend to result in war, conflict, and dead people.”

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Among the actions taken by the Council for Equality and Community (CEC) thus far, one of the most ground-breaking is the faculty development seminar scheduled to start in Spring 2009. According to the CEC, this “Social Justice Leadership and Service Learning” seminar will help make faculty members more understanding. Most crucially, it will end the inherent bias that many Lehigh classes have against certain groups of people. The seminar promises to “guide participants through the process of understanding the diversity of individuals in their classes and how to design effective instruction that is responsive to all students’ prior experiences and unique learning needs.” It will also make sure faculty “become more aware of their own racial, ethnic, religious, sexual, cultural identities and the power and privilege that comes with them,” and teach them to “incorporate field-specific diversity topics” into their classes.

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As a general rule, planning your class load for next semester is stressful. There are requirements to fill, time conflicts to worry about, and logging in at 10:00 pm with 1,000 other people (full disclosure: the author logs in at 9:30). With all of that said, you still have to avoid any class that starts at 8:00 AM and any class with a professor who says “uh” way too many times. (more…)

Sometimes, convincing someone to cast their vote for you is quite challenging. I learned this in those intense middle school elections of simpler days now long past. If it weren’t for Sarah and her seemingly endless supply of Jolly Rancher lollipops things might be different. Those grape ones were so tasty! As I quickly learned, elections can be tricky business if you don’t have the required political or sugar capital.

Politicians have learned this too. Unlike myself, though, they had sneaky solutions to the bombardment of proverbial Jolly Ranchers that they faced. Candy didn’t taste as good when it came from a pedophile, or a pervert, or a womanizer. This was the good old politics of the past. Today, due to those pesky reporters, mudslinging must at least have some basis in fact. Nonetheless, some of today’s “leaked” stories can carry just as much bite as the politics of old.

Now you may not have many more elections ahead of you, but certainly you will be fighting for a wife or a husband, a job, a promotion, an apartment, or really anything else. And when you know you can’t beat your opponent based on your own merits, your best bet is to learn from the politicians. Here are the five lessons you can take to heart when considering how to defeat your opponent, tried and tested by politicians of every political party:

1. Your opponent has broken every one of the Ten Commandments.

Nowadays, this attack probably wouldn’t even matter to the public. Other than number six, breaking the other nine commandments is basically cool. Stealing, adultery, false witness, coveting your neighbor’s spouse, and not keeping the Sabbath holy are all fairly common. But back in 1844 this was serious. James Polk’s campaign told voters that Henry Clay had indeed “broken every one of the Ten Commandments,” and that “his debaucheries… [are] too disgusting to appear in public print.” Nevertheless, Clay still won 48 percent of the popular vote. The lesson: this probably isn’t the best way to attack your opponent – today this could be a net positive.

2. Your opponent is a pimp, or his mother is a prostitute.

These two attacks are obviously radically different, though a combination of the two would be rather disgusting. I digress. These political punches were actually counters to each other during the lovely campaign of 1828 between Andrew Jackson and John Quincy Adams. Jackson supporters accused Adams of “providing entertainment” for Russian Czar Alexander I, and later Adams supporters called Jackson’s mother “a common prostitute.” Jackson ended up winning 56 percent of the popular vote. The lesson: It’s better to be the son of a prostitute than to be a pimp.

3. Your opponent is a coward.

Franklin Pierce was a general during the Mexican-American war. Being from New Hampshire, he wasn’t used to the heat, and he collapsed from heat prostration during a battle. When it came time to run for President, Franklin Pierce was named “the Fainting General” by opponents. Even with that stigma on his name, he still won all but four states. Americans have since learned not to tolerate military cowardice, and did not elect John Kerry in 2004 after his bravery in the military was questioned by some of his fellow swift-boat veterans. The lesson: if you are going to join the U.S. armed forces, show no fear.

4. Your opponent is just ugly.

As could be expected in the turbulent years leading up to the Civil War, the North-South divide caused some heated discussion. As a Northerner, Abraham Lincoln wasn’t a favorite politician in the South. In fact, he won a majority of the electoral college without even being on the ballot in many southern states. It’s easy to understand why: according to the Houston Telegraph, he was the “most ungainly mass of legs and arms and hatchet face ever strung on a single frame”. The lesson: let your opponent’s ugliness work on its own, pointing it out won’t help you much.

5. Your opponent has an illegitimate child.

This rumor about Senator McCain was brought up during the Bush-McCain primaries in 2000. McCain’s daughter Bridget was actually adopted from an orphanage in Bangladesh by McCain and his wife Cindy. But by anonymous polling, the Bush campaign suggested that McCain was Bridget’s biological father. Bush then went on to win the Republican primary. Thankfully in the general election, Bush didn’t need such smear tactics: they just hid a couple thousand ballots from Floridians and then paid off the Supreme Court. The lesson: smear tactics are great, but bribes and sneaky cheating can be just as effective.

Sources:

“A Historical Perspective on Presidential Campaigns”. Dr. Ken Stevens, 2003. http://www.his.tcu.edu/Frog&Globe/SiteArchives/Stevens-Elections.htm

(Quotes used for examples of mudslinging 1-4 were from this document)

“The Anatomy of a Smear Campaign”. Richard Davis. The Boston Globe, March 21st, 2004. http://www.boston.com/news/globe/editorial_opinion/oped/articles/2004/03/21/the_anatomy_of_a_smear_campaign/

(Information on example of mudslinging 5 were from this article)

You’d think there would be an article like that in a Cosmopolitan magazine right? But nope, it’s here in the Patriot! It’s so easy to pick out this three letter word anywhere; its like our eyes immediately jump to it. So what makes it so special, why do we lust for sex? If you are looking for sex then you’ve hit the jackpot! Here are the top ten places you can find sex:

10) Language

Honestly, half of our swear words have to do with genitalia or the act of having sex. We can turn everything we say into sexual innuendo with the right intonation and gestures (if you know what I mean) and we have a billion different ways to say “I had sex with so and so” in less than 4 words.

9) Art/Architecture

Why is everything so phallic in shape? And why do sculptures have to be naked? And how come naked women are sexy but naked men are funny? Also I don’t want to forget strip clubs, prostitution houses, and Chinese masseuse parlors.

Print (Books, Magazines)

Romance novels, adult books, men’s magazines (when you say men’s magazine it’s automatically assumed you mean Playboy/Maxim/FHM, not Auto Trader), and Cosmopolitan are among some of the leading contenders in this category that won’t be going away anytime soon.

7) TV

Desperate Housewives comes to mind, Nip/tuck as well, and Talk Sex with Sue Johanson is a cult classic.

6) The Bedroom

This is where you first encountered your parents going at it, and oh how it scarred you.

5) Music

It seems many popular songs today are about super manning things, or even trying to hit that, if you ever listen to the lyrics.

4) Advertising

Sex sells, so naturally if you look hard enough you can see subliminal sex references in most advertisements (or not so subliminal).

3) Spam e-mails

Honestly, they either have to do with increasing your penis size or giving you slick deals on Viagra/Cialis. But I have to wonder if women get these too?

2) Movies

Do I really have to explain this one? There are so many types, softcore, hardcore, fetish, etc.

1) Internet

Let’s face it, the Internet is for porn and it’s slowly putting the Hollywood porn industry out of business; too much free content to compete with.

There you have it. Sex, sex, everywhere, and not a soul in sight.